“Our Romance Story” -By Kelechi and Uloma Anyalechi

FFA: Please introduce yourselves

I am Mr. Kelechi Anyalechi. I am a Certified Coach, International Speaker and Author. I help people and organizations achieve their set goals in record time. I am the founder of Goal Getter Academy and the Managing Consultant at LifeIMPRINTS.

I am Mrs. Uloma Anyalechi, a UK Certified Life Coach and a banker. I am very passionate about helping young people discover purpose in life.

FFA: Wow! What a service oriented couple, our world is truly blessed to have you both! How long have you been married?

We’ve been married for 2 years and 4months.

FFA: Nice, what attracted him to you?

Uloma – I found out that we shared the same vision. I admire his spirituality very much. He is very hard working and he always follows through whatever he sets his mind on doing. I also call him, “fine guy”. I love the way he dresses as well. He is also very caring and romantic.

FFA: Oh yeah, “fine guy”?. What was the attraction sir?

Kelechi: The first thing that endeared her to me was her deep love for God. I also got attracted by her great spirit of giving, humility and simplicity. I noticed we share the same values and aspirations.  However, our main decision was based on God’s leading.

FFA: I like that, with God’s leading, you are covered. How did you propose?

Kelechi: My relationship with Oyoyo is very interesting. Before we were engaged, we were very close friends, who never had marrying each other on our plate. We just evolved and it was obvious what the next level was going to be.

At that time, I was not ready to go into another relationship. At some point, I began to have the nudging, but I ignored it. I told God I wanted a clearer confirmation. One evening, as I was dropping her off at home, she made a very remarkable statement in the car. In her words, “Kels, you need to write a book on how to woo a lady without “toasting”. I smiled and knew God had confirmed it.

FFA: Indeed!? This is getting interesting…

However, I still needed to show her that I valued her greatly. I did a surprise proposal, which involved few of our friends. That evening still remains fresh in my heart.

FFA: Wow! That was a terrific proposal, the picture speaks for itself. How do you fill your romance-tank, improve intimacy, and take romance to the next level?

We are very spiritual people, but we do not allow that stand in our way of our romance or intimacy. One way we improve intimacy is by communication. We are very free with each other when it comes to romance. We talk to each other about our sexual needs and it helps a lot. Sometimes, work can be cumbersome and overwhelming on both sides. On few occasions, we take our son to our parents’ place and stay together all by ourselves.

We talk a lot. We are best friends. We can sit at home together and talk for twenty-four hours without getting bored. That is how close our bond is. We also play a lot.

FFA: Awesome! The energy from you both is electrifying. Do you have family rituals/routines that bind you together?

Yea, we do. We have what we call “moment of truth”. It is a dedicated time where we express whatever we do not like about each other. While one person is talking, the other has no right to defend or interrupt. This has helped in building our relationship stronger. We are coming from different backgrounds and have different expectations. These sessions help us in adjusting.

FFA: Hmm, I’m loving this. “Moment of truth” is a very powerful tool for eliminating major communication barriers, such as assumption and misinterpretation. Thanks for that tip. How have you been able to navigate through the challenges of each phase of your marriage?

Kelechi: The “moment of truth” has helped us a great deal in the challenges in our marriage. Also, we have a trusted family we confide in. Few months after our wedding, my wife and I had a very serious quarrel. It lingered for more than two days and we did not talk to each other. I was very uncomfortable. By the second day, my wife made food for me and I refused to eat it. I called my elder sister and husband. They came to our house and spent the night with us to counsel us. My sister warned me never to reject my wife’s food again, no matter what. I have not done that ever since.

FFA: That’s the power of accountability! Thanks for being so open.

Also, my model is Jesus. No matter how often or the degree at which we hurt him, he always forgives. I have learnt to do same for my wife.

FFA: Nice one, “…husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church…”

Uloma: We are not a perfect couple yet, but I can say that we have grown a lot. We hardly quarrel. We also introduced a night curfew for any misunderstanding to be settled before going to bed.

FFA: “Night curfew”! This is great! What advice do you have for singles/the engaged?

Uloma: Work on yourself! Dedicate quality time to develop yourself physically, intellectually and spiritually. I used to have a funny mindset that I never needed a man or marriage to be fulfilled. This is still as true as ever. Even though, I initially took it over-board, it helped me build self-dependence. Do not rush into marriage because your friends are getting married. Getting married is one thing, while staying in it happy is another kettle of fish. Ensure that God is involved right from the very beginning and all the way.

FFA: Some words of wisdom there! Like we would often say, “in marriage, two independent people come together to form an interdependent union”. Thank you so much.

Kelechi: My wife and I have a Scripture we have been using all through our lives. It is found in Proverbs 19:21 (NIV) – Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails. Physically, my wife and I never had any thoughts to marry each other. If we were to go according to our personal desires, I would not have been her choice, neither would she have been mine either. Even while in my previous relationship, I always prayed to God for his PERFECT will concerning my marriage. It still beats me how we connected, but we are most assured that it was God’s perfect will for our lives. This is the ANCHOR of our marriage.

I will encourage singles to take their spiritual relationship with God seriously. Beyond everything, let Him be your guide and anchor.  A broken relationship is far better than a broken marriage.

Secondly, work on yourselves. If there are certain characters that you know are not good, deal with them before getting married. Things will not change automatically after you marry. Remember, you cannot pretend for too long.

Thirdly, be very open with each other. My wife and I opened up to each other before we got married. It helped to build trust within us. There is nothing you will tell my wife about me (good or bad) that she does not know already.

Fourthly, marry your FRIEND! This is non-negotiable for a sustainable and smooth marriage.

FFA: Hmm… Wise words! Any encouraging words for couples going through a challenging time?

Kelechi: I encourage you to let the Word of God rule your marriage beyond anything. The truth is that if couples live in full conformity with the Word of God, there would not be friction.

FFA: So right, it couldn’t have been said any better!

One person may be fully at fault, but play your own part in prayers, patience and perseverance. If you make up your mind that your marriage will blossom, it will. Sometimes, people come into marriage with the wrong mindsets and it is responsible for some of their challenges.

Also, seek help from the RIGHT source if possible. However, let that be the last resort. You must be very careful who you take your marriage challenges to.

FFA: So so true. Ain’t you both just loaded? We appreciate your sincerity and openness. Thank you so much for sharing your “Romance Story”.

To contact them and find out more about what they do, please reach them on –

Website: www.kelechianyalechi.com

Twitter: @IAmMrKels  @CoachUloma

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1978188805739580/

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