“I Am Out Of Here If It Does Not Work!”

One of the messages often projected by Hollywood about romance, relationship and marriage is simply that ‘if it is meant to be, then it will jOne of the messages often projected by Hollywood about romance, relationship and marriage is simply that “if it is meant to be, then it will just work out”; “things will fall in place by themselves”. In other words, if it takes effort, it’s a sign that something is wrong. This ideology is often reinforced on many big screens and some of them even make it to the box office, grossing billions of dollars in sales.

It’s tempting to consider this perspective, especially when things are not working in our relationships or marriage. At such times, any type of assurance or comfort seems to be soothing. However, the only challenge is that this does not align with reality. Anything successful requires effort, commitment and sacrifice and marriage is not an exception. According to Dr. David Oyedepo, “if you see anything working anywhere, realise that people are working it out”. A spicy and romantic marriage requires work such as nurturing, understanding, forgiving, apologising and pursuing your spouse. It’s about making each other the priority. This is why “marriage is brutal on selfish people.” |Jimmy Evans

Do you understand your spouse’s temperament and its peculiarities? Do you know how your spouse wants to be loved? Do you know that when people create a ‘back door’, with an attitude such as, if the marriage does not ‘work’, I am out, they eventually use it. This explains the ideology behind Prenuptial Agreements seen in most celebrities marriages.

ACTION POINT: If you were to rate your commitment and devotion to making your marriage work from 0-10 (zero being the least and ten being the highest), what would it be?

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Chidi & Victor Akunna
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About the Author

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Chidi & Victor Akunna are leading voices on marital romance and family life. They are passionate about helping individuals, couples and organisations build sustainable and valuable relationships, and testimonials abound. They are authors of many articles and books. They partner in the administration of “Romance Masterclass” – a coaching programme and “Lite the FIRE” workshop – a couples’ romance makeover intervention. Together, they write “Connected Hearts” – a leading daily devotional on spicing up marital romance and strengthening families. They also oversee the operations of Foundation for Family Affairs – a charity focused on strengthening families around the globe. Feel free to enjoy the resources available here!

2 Comments on "“I Am Out Of Here If It Does Not Work!”"

  1. atanda favou | 3rd May 2016 at 7:05 am | Reply

    I will say 6 out of 10

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