My Dirty Window!
Sometime ago, I read a story about a woman who often criticised her neighbour’s ‘dirty’ doors. This often happened at meal times as she looked through the window around her dining section. One day, she expressed utter shock at how clean her neighbour’s doors had become. “Wonderful, someone has finally decided to be responsible. That door is sparkling clean, interesting”. Unbeknownst to her, her husband woke up early to clean their window; it was not the neighbour’s door that was dirty, it was the window in her house.
Many times, as couples, we judge our spouses harshly, criticising them for every little fault. “I just can’t stand him”, “she drives me crazy”, “we are not compatible anymore”… Through observation, we believe that what happens to people is not really the problem, rather the issue is their interpretation of it. “The meaning we give a person or an event is what makes that person or that event a stumbling block or a stepping stone.” | Victor Akunna.
Life, romance and marriage is about perspective and our perspective is an offshoot of who we are, our values, beliefs and worldview; it has little to do with the situation.
Are you constantly complaining about your spouse? Could it be that you are the problem in your marriage? Do you think it is coincidental that you have the same problem with many other people?
ACTION POINT: Evaluate and work on your values and beliefs. To have a better marital romance, you must be a better YOU!
Chidi & Victor Akunna
Romance and Intimacy Catalysts
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